“But I Didn’t Get My First Choice in Sorority Recruitment”

#BamaRush TikTok is now a real thing. Like being caught up in a soap opera/daytime drama (are they even a thing anymore?) or going on a internet quest, it kept one occupied for a goodly amount of time. When I posted a link to a news story about the #BamaRush tik tok on the Focus on Fraternity History facebook page, there were comments that Alabama is untypical of most other recruitments. I agree. But that’s the one that just put a face to sorority recruitment for many who had no prior knowledge of sorority recruitment. The haters have come out of the woodwork. FYI, I suggest not reading the comments on the articles already published as it can be another huge time suck. Haters, especially haters of the fraternity and sorority system, will not be persuaded. Until the recent past, the numbers 20/20 indicated normal visual acuity. Those of us who lived through the year 2020 realize there was little normal about it. Covid-19 made life interesting, to say the least. Several of the National Panhellenic Conference (NPC) organizations came up with a novel way of initiating women who were unable to become full members during the spring semester. Virtual initiation became an actual thing. I’m quite sure no one had that on their strategic planning bingo card 25 years ago. An Alpha Epsilon Phi chapter at Concordia University in Montréal was installed virtually and it started a trend. And many women went through sorority recruitment virtually or in a hybrid situation.

Primary sorority recruitment is a mutual selection process. Potential New Members (PNMs) rank their choices based on the Preference Parties they attended and then the PNMs are matched up with the chapter that offers them a bid, based on where the PNM appears on the chapter’s ranked bid list. It sounds like a complicated process and it is. Sometimes the PNM doesn’t get her first choice. Sometimes this causes much angst for the PNM (and perhaps her mother, grandmother, etcetera, etcetera).

Some PNMs are fine with whatever chapter appears on their bid card, but a few women decide not to accept the bid they are given and drop out of recruitment. It’s not always easy and while the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence, adjusting dreams is a good lesson for the rest of one’s life. Blooming where one is planted is a skill which can come in handy throughout life. This year we are all getting a booster shot for this skill.

It’s all hard to explain to a 17 or 18-year-old who feels like she is the only one in the situation. All 26 NPC organizations are essentially the same, and one will have a similar experience in any of the groups. While our colors, badges, flowers, songs, etc. are all a little different, at the core, we believe in the same values. We are all sorority women.

This heartwarming story was posted several years ago by my Zeta Tau Alpha friend Gabbie Rimmaudo. For a time, she worked at Pi Beta Phi HQ and I loved that she would stop by the Archives when I was there. She loves fraternity history. I showed her the letter we have which was signed by Dr. May Agness Hopkins, who served as ZTA President. Her thoughts on getting her second choice chapter brought tears to my eyes and I told her so. I hope Gabbie’s story can resonate with some women who accepted bids to their second or third choice chapters. I hope they will embrace the opportunities that may be in their future.

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